Jeremy Piven Acts His Way Out of a Paper Bag Made...
The New York Times interviewed Jeremey Piven and it’s kind of funny. In an interview at The Times’s offices after the hearing, Mr. Piven, the Emmy-winning star of HBO’s “Entourage,” twice broke down in tears as he described a health scare that he said made him exhausted and disoriented during some performances of the play and ultimately left him fearing for his life. I’d heard he...
Michelle Bachman Will Teach Your Peeps to Speak... →
I wrote this piece for Indecision’s site. It was Dennis DiClaudio’s brilliant idea, but I am still pretty proud of what I did with it.
Mickey Rourke slapped Will Smith on the back and probably got pee everywhere....– Mickey Rourke Celebrates His Oscar Win - You Can Make It Up - Videogum Have you read this? Twice? Have you read it twice? If not, hop to it, jagoff! (via mtobey) This is the saddest good thing I’ve read all day.
Urlesque put me on this list of NSFW witticisms →
I made that joke in Before They Get Stales a million years ago. It’s way stale by now. Also, it’s a little humbling to see just how many people made basically the exact same joke. I am pretty flattered though, especially because Urlesque is cool and I like them. [via kryz]
Matt: I'm so behind on movies
Matt: I just saw No Country for Old Men last weekend
Matt: Have you seen this one called Birth of a Nation?
Matt: I've got it queued up
Gonzalo: yeah, all the critics are saying it's like writing history with a lightning bolt
Gonzalo: all the critics = woodrow wilson
Matt: back then he was the only film critic
Matt: he was the siskel and ebert of the teens
Gonzalo: he gave the film two rousing appendage protrusions upwards
Gonzalo: because back then they hadn't invented the word thumbs
CCinsider is the only one who gets it...
nickkroll: Nick Kroll just mentioned a blog post of mine on his Tumblr. Here’s the ccinsider post. Note to Self: name dropping comics I admire gets them to notice me. Additional Note to Self: Note to self jokes are really lame.
azizisbored: If you’re like me, you’ll confidently reblog this first, and ask questions later. And anyone who wants to take the pussy way out and give it a “like” - guess what? We’re done. paulscheer: My Favorite Parts about the Crank 2 Trailer… They explain the entire plot in 2 lines. Statham Molests a Old Lady for Static Electricity. It has a Montage of Screaming The Rocking...
Holy. Shit. Michael Cera finally on board for... →
mtobey: What a fun sexy time for him. First Andy Richter, now Michael Cera. All the prodigal children are returning. Tomorrow is surely judgement day, everyone.
Reason #114 I love Patton Oswalt: There’s not enough poetry based humor being made today.
Who's the most famous, least recognizable person...
mtobey: skybarn: nickdouglas: Amir Blumenfeld invented a game that I’m going to steal: Who is the most famous person (with some fame in America), living or dead but born after 1900, that the fewest people would recognize face-to-face? Amir thought of a great answer, and his commenters thought of two better ones. Before you peek, reblog with your best answer. Here’s an easy one to beat:...
Conan totally invented Danielle Plainview. Daniel Day Lewis ain’t got nothing on the Cone Bone. Conan drinks your old timey baseball game. He drinks it up.
bryanmckay: In response to popular support for marijuana legalization, Left-Libertarian Post writes: This once again proves that Americans shouldn’t be trusted to provide wise opinions on such matters. Drunk driving is already too big of a problem. Legalizing marijuana would be a disaster. Drunk driving is a huge problem, but we still allow responsible adults to make the choice to drink. And...
Easily The Smartest Article About Jeff Dunham Ever →
Or maybe I just assume this is a smart article because it was published by Slate and I am an impressionable tool. Either way.